Whipping Post Rant Thread

First topic message reminder :

 OK peeps as yer's all know ,there is always something wut goes on or happens that makes us just want to give it a good wut fer. 

This is the place to let it all go -sock it to it,this is it .
This is the place to let it rip. It might be political-it may be domestic,-it could be about a bogus product you bought that doesn't do wut it says it does. Maybe it's yer next door neighbor -wutever it is give a good wut fer here.  
Whip it ,just whip it, yea whip it, just whip it !

This is it !

This is the whipping post rant thread.

Whip it ,yea whip it ,whip it- just whip it-.Maybe you can't beat it but you sure can whip it 

Self assembly flat packs  

Why oh why do they not put all fittings in seperate bags instead of having to hunt through little plastic bags that need a chainsaw to open and using a lot of time to search for different size screws, locking nuts, metal and wooden dowels?????        

Anyway, 2 bedside cabinets, 2 chest of drawers and 2 double wardrobes all assembled and looking very nice indeed!

Hinge templates, hinges and tension screws equals high blood pressure, swearing like a trooper, physical violent attacks and near nervous breakdowns resulting in mother and daughter bruised, battered, aching everywhere and completely knackered!

But we won!   

   

It's absolute bliss to finally put away our clothes and put the suitcases away  

Just need a computer desk now....

another flat pack.... 

Oooh yes!!! it's a good job I noticed this...

we attached both sides of the first chest of drawers to the plinths then it came to putting the top on which we had prepared by following the instructions by inserting 2 metal dowels to the underneath of the top... then I noticed there were 2 extra holes to the opposite ends of the metal dowels and 1 extra hole in the tops of both chest of drawers sides...

there were 2 wooden dowels left in the plastic bag....read the instructions again and again, nothing about wooden dowels 

said to daughter they must go in or the back end of the top won't be fixed down...so in went the wooden dowels and 1 top for the chest of drawers firmly attached!
how bad is that to leave out a fitting that's needed in the instructions? 

  Yes those directions are written by funky turkeys that put out a bunch of gobble gobble which does nothing more then add to already mass confusion packed in box:rt2: 

 

The best thing to do is start out by reading the directions than lay those directions down and whip it !   

that having been done ,yer are thasn prepared to begin assembly whip it style 

Dont use a right handed thread with a left handed screw driver and vice verser L.G. and be careful if you throw your rubber hammer as it could go all over the place and come back at you  and your assembled flat pack will again become a flat pack as the Hammer hits it  the glue goes in the hole on the wooded peg not on the floor or wall etc  and dont try useing a foot pump as it will not pump up your flat packs like it dose an inflatable pool ok  

You think you got a deal but the deal isn't real
they pack in a box and tell you it;s simple like hopscotch
in the store they got you curious 
but when you get home you become furious

easy to assemble thats what they say but little do you know it will take you all day
you unpack the box and it seems like dirty socks
the nightmare has begun and it's just a smoking gun
the directions say it's easy but it just too sleezy
yer anger's on the rise as the madness truely fly's

so whip it just whip it yea whip it just whip 

 

whip it  

 

just when u think life is going good...something comes along and F*@#$ u up the A$$

It's always the way Myra 

  who ever it was who said life for most is not fair    got it bang on i recon

 Ther's not enough ranting going on here  ,yer's have to get in the groove and whip it  

 

Mr Whippy the ice cream van has stopped coming out now....you can whip that if you want 

Mr. Whippy sold his van  B-cause the whole thing was a scam
he had a seedy partner with a very different plan
they were really selling dope untill they reached the end rope
Mr Whippy's in dept b cause he fell out of step
he really couldn't beat it so he had to place his bet

So whip it, yea whip it so whip it yea whip it
     

Niagara you bring out a rap song 

  

Hay,Mr Crow you looking at me
looking at me,looking at me
Hay Mr Crow,yeah you in the tree
you up there,you looking at me.

I know it was you who crapped
on my door,yeah on me door
crapped from that tree,

I got a gun,and its looking at you
yeah looking at you,looking at me
get your wings out stretched
and fly away,fly away,fly away
or i'll blow you away,blow you away

Next time I see that on mi door
I promice you be laying on this floor
laying on this floor,yeah Mr Crow
im a talking about you......about you.

so don't sit there looking at me
cos if I see any crap coming from
that tree,its eye ball to eye ball
combat,an I give it for free.

  

  Go MC Beaver RapMazzter!   

  Yeah Babe,that there crow
is now in the know,
one more blob an its doom city
feathers rain,tree spinning floating day
when sky meets Mother Earth
a crow has to know its limits
blob mi door and its curtains,sure is
He knows I love him rearly
well I like feed the crap master
maby I to dam good to him
cos he flys around with a full mag
but now he as a got da message
aim yer bum gun on some others door
or im a aiming mine at him
an he be receiving an extra out let see
ahr I see him sitting there pondering
yeah you up there pondering me down
here,is it bread or lead Mr Crow.

I'm sensing a hatred of crows 

 That crow is a very Dirty little boy
not nice to do that on mi door
iv oiled mi gun,and I don't just do that
for fun,so iv I were him I would run
or fly his choice,but he sits there looking
all sad,so iv given him some chicken fat
instead,and pointed to her across the
roads door,i think he has got the message.

Got the hump again niagara? 

 woke up this morning,must have kicked the sheets and blankets of me while I slept,i lay there like a frozen fish finger,so reached out to pull those sheets and blankets back and got a right cramp in both legs  was up and out that bed like a lightning bolt and doing some thing akin to an Irish jig around the bedroom  i'll best not try to mention the singing that I did at the same time all out of key I might add