Medical for enlistment

Man trying to get out of the call up
for the army,the medical officer say's
can you read the top line of that poster
on the wall from the other side of the room
no said the man,the officer says stand closer
can you read it now,no said the man,stand closer
can you read it now,no said the man,Medical officer
say's well tell me,if you were in the trench's and
a thousand enemy soldiers charged your trench would
you see them coming 500 meters away,no dont think so
said the man,oh well if 5000 enemy soldiers charged
only 250 meters from you what then,the man said
dont think so,well then said the officer lets cut
to the bottom line,how about if 10,000 enemy soldiers
only 30 meters from your trench would you be able to
see them then,the man said well seeing as how there
are 10,ooo soldiers only 30 meters away,well i think
i might just be able to see them,Good said the
medical officer,that's how they come at you
you past the medical your in the army now.

Man given a bottle to pee in by
army Medical officer who say's
take that home with you and give
me an early morning sample of your
urine,the man goe's home and not
wanting to join up ask's his family
for help,so first Gran give's a sample
then his Dad,the his mother,then his
sister,then he top's up the bottle
and take's the sample back to the
medical officer,who take's the sample
into the back room,after about half
an hour the Medical officer come's back
look's at the man sitting there and say's
your results are as follow's,
your Gran has Dimenture,
your Dad has V.D.
Your Mum has a water infection
your Sister is pregnant
your's is normal
so your in the Argile's