Defenitions of a Military birth

It was reported in an official dossier leaked through Wikkileaks that the Definition of a Military Birth,Classified at first until a whistle blower leaked the information to the Media is as follows:cl2: 

The Definition being that a lady of the female persuasion  giving birth by act of a Military maneuver without blank firing attachments being fitted to their weapons,as being Blasted into Maternity by the act of receiving a direct hit with a guided Mussel,the launch pad for said mussel being still classified at time of going to print.   

All men should have a rugby ball inserted high up into their back passage, given a laxative and they will then experience a similar act of child birth, if they need stitches after...that would be an added bonus to the experience  

Would that be the same as what those of the naughty Female type do with ping pong balls L.G.   

  I heard about a woman who could fire ping pong balls out from her nether region, makes you wonder what the heck she was doing to have discovered that

 L.G.I suppose its a good exercise for the pelvic muscles  i wonder if she hit whatever she was aiming at